The "Why"

As I sat on the bus this morning, I got to thinking about the “why?” Everyday we swim, bike, run, attend yoga, pilates, physical therapy, spinning classes, or whatever physical activity we each decide to do that day. Some of us get up at 5:00am, sometimes earlier, or some of us wait until after work to release our fury on our activity of choice. It’s become part of our being. It’s like breathing—this desire to run during the sunrise, or bike indoors to the thoughts and songs of ourselves on our trainers.
The biggest and most important race of my life is a short 3 days away. During my runs, I have been left with plenty of time to think about my life, the life of others, and about life in general. I have worked harder towards this race than any other race I have done. I naturally wake at 5:00am every morning, whether I want to or not, my body is ready to go at the same time every day. I have mentally and physically pushed my limits, pushed through walls, and have defeated my fear of long distance running and my belief I would never run a marathon. I cried at the end of my 20 miler 3 weeks ago because I did it—I cried because running is a sport in which you use your own legs, your own power, your own ability to get across that finish line. There is to team in running. Only U (you) and I.
As I watched Chicago go by outside the bus window this morning, I realized we (myself included) too often forget the “why;” we forget the journey. We sometimes get caught up with work, school, our race pace, our times, and we forget why we are in our saddles, why we are in our Brooks or Mizunos, or in our bathing suits 6-7 days/week. We too often don’t take the time to ask ourselves “why am I doing this?” We wake up on too many mornings and seem to forget how lucky we are; we have the ability to use our bodies to do such amazing things—we forget that we CAN. I recently read a touching article about Jenny Crain in the November issue of Runner’s World. She was an Olympic qualifier until she got hit by a car 2 years ago while crossing a street on a run, and now she struggles to walk 50 feet and cannot remember anything from before the accident. The article and her life reminded me how very quickly everything can be taken away.
I know life gets busy—between trying to balance work, family, friends, school, and training, sometimes it’s hard to come up for air, and sometimes very difficult to see the light at the end of a very long tunnel. It helps during these times to know your own “why.” The “why” is what pushes you through every day; the “why” is the journey—what we all should revel in every single workout.
What is my “why?” On Sunday, my “why” is my grandmother. I run in honor of the 20 years she suffered chronic Alzheimer’s. My fuel, my why, is the last good bye and I love you she said to me 2 days before she passed away—those last few moments she remembered who I was. My “why” everyday is in honor for those who don’t have the opportunity to have a “why,” like Jenny Crain. My “why” everyday is in because crossing a finish line teaches me more about myself than any other book or professor. My “why” is because pushing myself to my absolute physical and mental limits is what makes me feel strong enough to take on and change the world.
What is your “why”?